7 Laws of Wellness for Caregivers

Keep These 7 Laws of Wellness for Caregivers, Based on the Work of Deepak Chopra, Close to Hand and Heart and Your Caregiving Experience WILL Change for the Better…

 

“In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside you.”

~ Deepak Chopra

 

7 Laws of Wellness for Caregivers | Press Here | Care for You, Inc | Washington, DC

Being a caregiver isn’t ‘easy’,but that doesn’t mean it has to be difficult—we think it is, so it is…

True, sometimes it feels like there just aren’t enough hours in the day. And if you’re juggling the care of an elderly loved one, a full-time job, as well other responsibilities like being a parent, sometimes there really aren’t enough hours in the day.

You may be able to pick up some minutes (or even hours) by prioritizing and staying focused, by delegating tasks where it makes sense to, and by knowing your limits and asking for help before you reach them.

But it is of the utmost importance to remember that the thoughts we think regarding what we need to do in a day are tremendously powerful.

Henry Ford said this: “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.”

And those thoughts affect our emotions—either adding stress or adding strength.

Tell yourself, “I just can’t… it’s too much… I’m just not capable,” and notice how beat down you feel by day’s end. Because, even with that negative narrative running on a loop in our heads, we still have a person in need to attend to.

The next day say, “I can do this, I will do this,  and I’ll be present as I am doing this.” Notice how affirmations like that bolster the self-esteem and are even reinvigorating.

Here are 7 Laws of Wellness for Caregivers to Read, Remember, Practice and Repeat

1) Pure Potentiality. Everything is possible. When we’re overwhelmed it’s easy to start telling ourselves that what we need to do is “impossible.” It’s not.

But what’s required before making it happen is taking a step back, taking a deep breath (or several) and asking for what you want/need from this moment.

Then, listen without judgments, e.g. There’s not enough time, money, etc…

The answer will come—it may entail changing the way you’re going about things, even dramatically, but it will come. The trick is to be quiet enough to hear it, and brave enough to act on it.

2) Giving. Doing it with gratitude means doing it right—it is gratitude that receives and in gratitude gives back. The pay out for maintaining this awareness is an enthusiastic acceptance of the abundant nature of life. That’s a whole lot better than grinding through your day based on some dull sense of obligation. 

3) The Golden Rule/The Law of Attraction/Karma. Whatever you call it, it works very simply: we get what we give.

But this isn’t to say that if we have a rough day it’s because we “deserve” it. More than likely it’s because we weren’t being mindful of it. In other words, subjective ideas like bad days, challenging days and days that we learn invaluable life lessons from have everything to do with attention and intent.

Choosing, as consciously as we can, to make someone happier, more comfortable and at ease is to automatically invite those same influences into our own lives. We’re thinking about them, so we’re attracting them.

4) Least Resistance. Be like the river—it doesn’t flow up the mountainThat saying, “Only dead fish go with the flow”? It’s largely b.s. (Are you thinking about salmon? So are the bears…)

Taking this principle out of analogy and starting to apply it to your duties as a caregiver might seem tricky, if not impossible—there’s that word again!—where essentials like cleanliness, taking meds, and eating are concerned.

But practicing the Law of Least Resistance doesn’t mean saying, “Oh, okay, well then you don’t have to eat today,” when you come up against resistance. It means not taking the refusal personally. And it means cultivating your talent for fluidity and creativity in these situations.

Instead of getting angry: “YOU HAVE TO EAT!” try saying, “I understand that you aren’t interested in having yogurt for breakfast. But you always tell me that you feel better after you eat. So, tell me, what would your perfect breakfast look like if you could have anything and everything that you wanted right now?”

If it’s coffee and pie, do it. They can’t have caffeine? Get decaf. (Of course we’re not saying that it’s fine to neglect legitimate health concerns, especially where medications are involved, but keep it within reason. I.e., getting bogged down in arbitrary details and routines helps no one.)

And if the answer is still “I don’t want to eat,” try it again in 15 minutes.

5) Intention and Desire.

Inherent in every intention and desire is the mechanics for its fulfillment. And when we introduce an intention in our pure potentiality, we put this infinite organizing power to work for us.” ~ Deepak Chopra

Putting this law to work for you might look like taking five minutes every morning to visualize what you want for yourself and your loved one as the day goes forward, focusing not only on the what, but also the why. Doing this primes the brain to see the how.

6) Detachment. This doesn’t mean being emotionally unavailable or mentally cold. It means remembering that it’s okay to be okay with events as they unfold.

Going back to number 5—if you’re focusing on dad’s Alzheimer’s going away because that would be easier for everyone, you’ll likely be disappointed…

Instead, cultivate detachment by acknowledging the frustration that arises when moments seem to repeat themselves—over and over again—by consciously choosing to replace it with acceptance of what is. This allows for fluidity and creative problem solving, e.g., “Don’t want to walk to the cafe? How about we metro to the museum? There’s a new exhibit there that I think you’ll love.” Once you’re there, eat at the museum cafe.

7) Service/Reason/Talent. We’re of best service to others when we’re using our unique talents, interests and inspirations and applying them to our work as caregivers—enthusiasm is contagious. (And so is the lack of it.)

If you really hate sitting in movie theaters don’t offer to take your loved one to the movies!

Chances are mom also likes going out to eat, exploring the botanical gardens or making popcorn at home and watching a movie from the couch. Pick one that you both can get excited about.


To do right by someone else, you need to be doing right by your self.

We say it, claim to know it, take it as truth… and then don’t act on it.

Start following these 7 laws of wellness for caregivers. The better you treat yourself, the better your experience will be.

 

To your happiest, healthiest self,

Care for You

 

P.S. Caring for a loved one in the greater Washington, DC metro area? Call us at 301-650-4169 or visit our Contact page. We can help.

The article you just read is based on Deepak Chopra’s books The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success and The Seven Spiritual Laws for Parents.

 

1 comment

This is an extremely helpful article for caregivers! Thank you for sharing it 🙂

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